Just Like New!
Nouvea Disques is having fun with the loglines – or the ‘ten word’ summaries marketing hams conceive – home video distributors have to describe this week’s DVD releases. (Do they even make VHS anymore? [Answer: Yes!]) A great sampling of the premium releases follow after the jump…
Up In the Air is described as “Corporate downsizing expert’s life is turned upside down.” Now, wouldn’t you just LOVE if they said George Clooney’s Ryan Bingham – and his life – ‘takes off’? I almost corrected it up there. Some people are too dumb to breathe… The Paramount marketing team should be shot, not just for that oversight, but for the fact that the eye-catching one-sheet poster art for the film was scrapped, and no one – at least not I – can find word one regarding any extra bonus material for the disc(s). [Author's Note: After some digging, I found out that there is a commentary track with director and co-writer Jason Reitman, who is joined by his DP and 1st AD, which is cool; and, there's at least five deleted scenes included on each of the SD or Blu-Ray discs.]
Wow, look at how happy we are!
Precious‘ logline makes me wanna eat: “Forgotten inner-city girl is given a second chance at life.” Isn’t the point of the film that she makes that second chance for herself? The telling of her story of perseverance is what the film really tries to accomplish, or am I wrong? Oscar acting noms for Gabourney ‘Gabby’ Sidibe and Mo’Nique, and a well-deserved win for the latter. There’s about an hour of supplementary material, not including the audio commentary track with director Lee Daniels.
The old hags in Old Dogs are “Two bachelors… charged with the care of twins.” That is all I care to acknowledge about this movie…
The “American astronaut [that] lands on [an] already inhabited planet” is voiced by Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson in Planet 51. It’s a solid kids flick with fun animation and visceral action. A formulaic plot that could very well be analogized as Avatar for kids. More than enough extras to keep the chil’ens interested.
Capitalism: A Love Story is the latest from Michael Moore, fatman provocateur. The marketing whizzes attribute the film as a “look into the greed that is at the center of capitalism.” Moore sensationalizes, and propagandizes, his way through this latest sermon to his leftist choir. And if that’s not enough, there’s an additional 80+ minutes of bonus scripture from a groaning pulpit.
Speaking of pulpits, yer cult catholic altar boy killers are back, but this time, without the fun! The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day releases today across all platforms to renown disappointment. But for all you diehards out there, the inevitable cast and crew commentary accompanies a Billy Connolly outtake interview(?), a BTS featurette about what tripe on which you just wasted your money, and a bevy of deleted scenes. You knew there were gonna be deleted scenes, you just figured the feature shouldn’t be included with them. Holy Mother Mary and Joseph!
The picture of 80s Guido-chic!
TUBULAR VISION – Wiseguy: Collectors Edition. This is my sister’s favorite forgotten television show. And for that alone, it is worth a watch or even purchase, as she is known for impeccable taste in this arena: Homicide, The Wire, Deadwood. These were all her recommendations. So, Ken Wahl’s star – and his character Vinnie Terranova, as well – rose and fell with this Golden Globe winning series from the late 80s about an undercover agent working for the “Organized Crime Bureau” in an early day predecessor to Scorsese’s GoodFellas.
COLLECTION OF THE WEEK – TCM Greatest Classic Films Collection: Hitchcock Thrillers. This box-set contains his 1941 release of Suspicion; one of my favorites, Strangers on a Train; I Confess; and, The Wrong Man. The set is $19.95, pre-tax, and is simply a fantastic deal. The four films come from semi-disparate periods of the director’s storied career, all of which are notable for one reason or another. Turner Classic Movies’ pedantic host Robert Osbourne has piquant thoughts on the films in there as well. And as smarmy as I think the guy can be, he rarely fails to offer anything but informative commentary.
Aaaaaaannd pliet!
PUMP ME UP – Trudie Styler: Sculpt & Tone Ballet. Sting’s wife wants to pirouette your way to a fine ass. She’s a looker, but I wonder how well this will attract the male consumer.
